God determines....

"God determines who walks into your life....it's up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go." - annonymous

I always find people so interesting. Everyone comes with different stories, different backgrounds, different strengths and different weaknesses. Where we come from has molded us and shaped us into who we are today.

I am learning (slowly as it may be...) that I can only be responsible for me, for who I am, for what I have to offer, and for the actions that I make... Who am I to determine how somebody else should respond in a certain situation or environment... I am not God, but I am responsible to him, responsible to him for MY actions, for MY words, MY thoughts... I am responsible to be all that he created me to be.

Sometimes this is a hard lesson for me to grasp - and one that I am seemingly always learning over and over again... I sometimes wish that I could 'help' people to come to the same conclusions that I come to - or 'help' them to be what I think would be best... how completely and utterly awful of me! Truly no good is in me! As if I would try to deny someone to be all that they are called to be - simply because that does not fit into what I think is best... I am not omnicient - all-knowing God... ugh - humbled again...

Papa, search my heart and know my thoughts... make me whole and pleasing in your sight - you are the one that matters and you are the one that I will never let go of! If I get a choice - I choose you! Good times come, hard times come... but always you are there... always you are behind me, protecting me... in front of me, guiding me... and always beside me holding my hand through it all....
I sometimes wonder sweet Jesus, how I will ever find a love even half as precious as yours... is it possible? sigh... I am content in your arms, you feed the deep recesses of my heart, you fill the longings of my heart... you speak to the romance that is sacred... I am yours and you are mine... some may not understand, and many will mock the love that we share... but that does not negate the fact that it is true.... YOU sweet Jesus, I refuse to let go of...