Kidney Failure - a spiritual glance

yesterday felt like a blur... got up by nine but had to go back to bed... I couldn't even function! (after my 12hr shift on Sun, I went over to a friends house to help her with some wedding plans... she wants me to be in the wedding party... story for another time soon!)

Anyway, in my blur of a day I didn't tell you about my time at the hospital on Sunday. It was pretty interesting. I had a patient who was in Kidney Failure. She hadn't voided (went pee) in 36 hours! She came in for dehydration but what the doctor thinks is that she was so severely dehydrated when she came to us that she had already caused damage to her kidneys... poor sweetheart!

So today... looking to spend some time with my Papa before I get all crazy busy with assingments... I wanted to update you on my happenings, and he told me to dig a little deeper into the case! How does the 'kidney' fit into my personal life - aside from the physical of course! tee hee... so here goes my exploration!

Jesus talked a lot in parables and as I was thinking about this, I am thinking about how often we allow ourselves to become so dry, and keep to ourselves so much that we pur our lives into failure.
There are numerous results of kidney failure... one being the fact that no matter how much you take in, you cannot get rid of it... and thus, build up toxins in your body. Our Papa wants us to filter what we take in, to measure it according to the standard of the word, and get rid of all that is not necessary to our lives. Sometimes we think that what we are taking in is not harmful, but I am forced to look at the kidney again... too much even of a good thing can be harmful - there needs to be an output!
We are created in the image of God - he is giving in all that he does and I am thinking if we don't allow ourselves to pour out what we have put in, then we are not functioning in the capacity that we are created for and moving toward degeneration....
So I ask myself, first of all, "what am I putting in? Am I getting the 'nutrients' that I need to keep myself healthy? Am I getting enough?" Then I ask, "Do I have an output?" "Am I getting rid of the waste that I knowingly and unknowingly put into my person?"
I admit that I need to do some adjusting in my life... my in needs to equal my out... and I need my spiritual kidney/filter to work... getting rid of the toxicities that are a part of my past, present and future... Papa, I don't want to go into failure... help me!

some new experiences!

Another long day... but better than yesterday! It was raining when I left this morning for the bus... but made it to the hospital in good time... a little wet, but ready to start the day!
It was a great day as far as learning went... had a few new experiences - packing a sternal wound was a first for me... it was basically a hole in the chest with tunnelling about the size of the line in the picture. I had to pack it with about 26" of ribbon soaked in NS (normal saline... NaCl)... then cover with a dry dressing... went verrry well if I do say so myself!
My next learning opportunity came when I got to accompany one of my preceptor's patients to the OR (operating room). He was having oral surgery for a Lt lateral mandible # (fractured jaw). The surgeon showed me the CT scans and Xrays... then he proceded to wired the guys jaw... it was pretty cool to watch... but almost made me sick - I hate dental work - feels too close to home.. ugh.. shivers just thinking about it!
Also did a catheter... not new... but there is definitely something to follow up on tomorrow because she is not having any urinary output... not a good sign... have to keep an eye open!
Anyway... day ends... home time... AND I have a ride home! No bus for me... one of the guys (Jarah or J) drove me - turns out he lives just around the corner! So he is going to pick me up in the morning too because he is working days again also....

wow thats a long day!

Ok... up this am at 5... bus stop at 6... clinical 7-7... bus home... walked through the door at 8:40pm.... yikes! This morning when I left I could see all the stars in the sky... and when I got out of the hospital at the end of the day... it was mostly dark... thats crazy!

Today was good though - the nurses are great... and I got to do an ECG for the first time! yay for learning... anyway, I am showered and ready for bed - sooo g'nite!

Repeat today... tomorrow and the next day... wow

Hulas, Leis, Malibu and BIRTHDAYS!

In all of my excitement to share the completion of bootcamp, I forgot to share about the hula party!

It was Jillybean's birthday party last night... we had a barbeque (thanks BJ) and were supposed to wear grass skirts when we went out (that got cancelled) to see our friends band play... We DID however have leis and flowers for our hair and coconuts to drink from!
There were others there celebrating various occasions, one guy was moving to California... and another guy from Detriot was celebrating his birthday also... so we invited them to join in our birthday celebration... AND yesterday was also Ruth's birthday... it was so great talking to her... hearing the voice of someone from Terrace!
There were lots of people who showed up to help celebrate with Jilly - and it was great to see some people that I still hadn't seen since being back in Ontario. Good times... and good memories...

Bootcamp done... time for the Battlezone!

Nursing Bootcamp, designed to prepare us for the battlezone that will be our clinical environment. 5pm today marks the completion of my 12 hours in the simulation lab and I must say, I did pick up a few things... and I am looking forward to starting tomorrow at LHO (Lakeridge Health Oshawa). If I haven't said it before, I will be working on the cardiopulmonary floor - 4M. I have a great deal to learn in this area of nursing and my preceptor (nurse mentor) seems like a great woman and my faculty advisor is someone who I look up to a great deal - they are both wonderful nurses and I will do well if I can become even half the nurse that they are. I don't want to settle for half though, I will start with what I have and what I know, and who I am... and through the years to come I will develop my skills and my nursing knowledge and become the very best nurse that I can be... one day (if not today) you'll all want me as your nurse!

Laundromat and Smoothies

So got up today to have some coffee with Jilly out on the back porch... it was nice to sit and chat with her - we are both so busy with different schedules... gosh I love that girl! She makes me feel so loved...

Jilly had to go get her car sticker (birthday on Saturday), so she dropped me off at the laundromat - I had two weeks worth of laundry to do... totalled three loads! Crazy! It was my first time doing laundry at a laundromat - but because my washing machine broke over the summer it was a necessary journey for me to make! It was a decent experience... not life-changing or anything though...

Bootcamp today was only an hour long because we had class at 4... my pretend patient was a kid in an isolation room for ESBL, MRSA, and C-diff... (thanks Mills for the prep!)

Class was cool... we watched a documentary: The Boy in the Bubble... really makes you question the quality of life... and the measures that we take in order to protect life rather than just trust God to take over...hmmm

After class, instead of going to the gym, we went over to this new place around the corner from my place called "Jus Chillin'" It is a really cool place where they have music, food, and an environment for all ages... and, I know the owner! We have decided that we are definitely going to be going every week for Twoonie Tuesday (smoothies for $2 every Tues) after class... ALSO they have wireless access, so I may go more often to sit and do some work...! It'll be great.

Tonight... just had a chat with Justin on msn... he is still acting wierd... whatever... he is supposed to call later... For now, watching some Grey's Anatomy and getting some research for some upcoming papers... ugh

its been a FULL day! :)

Up today for cawfee with Kandi.... we met at 9:30 (she picked me up) and I was up at 8 so I had time to spend with my JC... we had a little talk about trust... and then I spent some time thinkin an prayin for some pples...

Cawfee with Kandi....I had a great time with Kandi... she is such a woman of faith - wow... impressive! She has such a beautiful heart... I love spending time with her!

Home in time for AJ to come over and study a bit - my oh my do I still have so much to learn! We cut that off about 2 in the aft... headed to they gym! We had a great workout - I did about 50 mins (500cal) on the elliptical trainer and then weights as well... so definitely a good one... my shirt was drenched - couldn't wait to shower!

Home again... shower! ahh clean... just in time to do the dishes and make some dinner for BJ and Jilly... mmm... hungry after that workout... but then super sleepy and still hours before my hip hop class! sooo... nap time!

Up at 6pm... couldn't let myself nap too long cuz then I am up forever! So got up to watch movie... FANTASTIC MOVIE!!! (Step Up) I admit, it was a little pump me up, inspirational movie for me as tonight was my first Hip Hop class...

Chan arrived at 8pm... to pick me up for our dance class! Checking directions one more time to the venue... and we were off...

The class was great - we learned about 6-7 counts of 8... which is pretty decent for an hour I guess... its gonna be great when we start a full routine - although I am not so sure about the whole recital business!!!

Home again... smiles... shower again... sigh... and now... catching up here and everywhere else...getting hungry again though... I probably should go to bed rather than eat... hmm... well, I don't actually HAVE to be anywhere until 3pm tomorrow (Bootcamp - before class 4-7)... so maybe I will watch a little Grey's Anatomy 2nd Season!!!

In God I trust

Those who KNOW your name will TRUST in you, for YOU, Lord, have NEVER forsaken those who SEEK you. ~ Psalm 9:10

Can anyone think of believing in God without trusting Him? IT is possible to trust in God for the big things like forgiveness and eternal life, and then refuse to trust him for the little things like clothing and food? ~ Oswald C. J. HOffmann

My job is to take care of the possible and trsut God with the impossible. ~ Ruth Graham Bell

Blessed are thos who trust inthe Lord, whose trust is the Lord. They sahll be lieka tree planted by water, sending out its roots by the stream. It shall not fear when heat comes, and its leaves shall stay green; in the year of drought it is not anxious, and it does not cease to bear fruit. ~ Jeremiah 17:7-8


Its funny how little that I do trust... Its times like these where I am confronted with mantras of trust... that I am encouraged to look at my own life and to reflect upon what level my trust is like... can I really say like Ruth Graham Bell that I do my part and allow God to take care of his... He says his yoke is easy and light... but I think it is me that makes it heavy by trying to take care of the numerous 'impossibles' in my life... hmm... imagine if I were to trust all the 'impossibles' to God... yes, a light yoke to carry! Imagine... Papa has a reason to his madness... giggles... sigh... and so each and everyday I make my commitment anew... to trust God with my heart, with my mind, with my body... He sees my past, my now, and my future... he knows best - I trust you today Papa...

Concert time....

YAY... got my concert tickets for the Rascal Flatts concert Nov 1 at the ACC.... going with two of my girlies... we are gonna have a blast! Opening for them is Gary Alan - who is also wonderful! Its gonna be great! As much as I miss my mountains... I do love being so close to Toronto and the culture of it! Definitely going to have to plan for a few more joyous events....

Loooong Day

this is definitely going to sound like rambling... I am soo tired... after only four short n sweet hours of sleep I was up and had to be ready for AJ to pick me up for our wonderful 8am class.... after class was over, we headed to the gym for a workout before I had to be back on campus to pick up my laptop... waited in line for an hour because there were a million other students scheduled to pick up their laptop at the same time... then made it to MJ's class just in time to hear about an assignment that is worth the full 100% of our final mark... oh joy... on the upside of that class... we finished early and I was home by 4pm... but for only five minutes as I had to head over to Theresa's to watch Braeden so that Anne (the mom-in-law to be) could go to work... Jilly and Theresa and Victoria arrived by 6 and we all packed into Theresa's car (she has the car seat for Braeden) and headed out to do some shopping for Jilly's hawaiian birthday party! We made a few stops for wedding details... like shoes and trying on the bridesmaid dress - fun!!!
So... made it home by 8pm... had a shower... set up my wireless router (which isn't working properly... grr) and put a few programs on my laptop... yay - feels great to have my laptop!
Ok... so it doesn't really seem like a long day... but leaving at 7:30 and home at 8 on four hours sleep... I am silly... feels good to be tired though.... anyhoo... up and outta here by 7:30 again for some more nursing bootcamp (nursing lab) in the am!

crazy workout at the gym

So after a ridiculous class today (Current Issues in Health Care) where everyone freaked out like kindergarten children... AJ and I went to the gym... which was wonderful because so far I have kept to my schedule! It was a great workout... I was dripping quite literally and now... wow tired! tee hee... guess that's to be expected...
Also today... got my package from BC... with all my extra stuff that I shipped separately - good timing cuz there is stuff in there that I need!
Anyhoo... need to shower... someday I'll be organized and write a decent post!

Why go to church?

A Church goer wrote a letter to the editor of a newspaper and complained that it made no sense to go to church every Sunday. "I've gone for 30 years now," he wrote, "and in that time I have heard something like 3,000 sermons. But for the life of me, I can't remember a single one of them. So, I think I'm wasting my time and the pastors are wasting theirs by giving sermons at all." This started a real controversy in the "Letters to the Editor" column, much to the delight of the editor.

It went on for weeks until someone wrote this clincher:"I've been married for 30 years now. In that time, my wife has cooked some 32,000 meals. But, for the life of me, I cannot recall the entire menu for a single one of those meals. But I do know this. "They all nourished me and gave me the strength I needed to do my work. If my wife had not given me these meals, I would be physically dead today. "Likewise, if I had not gone to church for nourishment, I would be spiritually dead today!" --Author Unknown

Wheelchair Relay 2006!

Hey peoples...

Just sent out a zillion emails to people asking for pledges for the wheelchair relay that I am participating in on Sunday September 17, 2006!

This pic is from last year - it was a great time and I know that it is for a good cause!

I first heard about this through the people that I travel with. Kevin works for CPA (Canadian Paraplegic Association) and so has a large part in organizing this event! The event does a lot in order to help people who have new inuries and I know first hand how important their work is as I have had numerous opportunities to travel with people who have sustained spinal cord injuries. The CPA works toward educating and helping integrate people with various levels of 'ability' back into the community after their life changing accidents... its incredible to watch people do things 'for the first time' post-injury!

If you guys think you could spare even just $10 (one McDonald lunch) to help out that would be absolutely awesome... and as you know... you can use the receipt that they send you for your taxes... yay! Money back is always super wonderific!

There is a site you can pledge on that you can go to - its totaly secured!

OH!! Thanks to my cuz Laura... her donation of $50!!! You are the most awesomest!

last day of orientation...

Its wonderful... orientation is over... and it was successful!

Today we worked through various case studies for the morning and then in the afternoon we were in the lab working on the simulation dummies... very cool! And... thanks to Mills Memorial of Terrace... I am well prepared for med/surg this semester on 4M at Lakeridge Health Oshawa! I was really worried before today... but now I am feeling a lot more confident - still a lot to learn, but I am not so worried!

Oh... picked up my student card too at lunch... it has the UPASS on it which gives us access to all public transit in the durham region! Yay for me cuz I have no car!

After we left campus AJ and I went to grab gym clothes and headed to Goodlife for the first time in 4months! Crazy! Felt incredible though... can't wait for tomorrow's workout!

Tonight... Justin is coming over - should be here any minute... we are gonna watch movies and have some great conversation... chemical changes in the leaves part II... too funny...

another survey...

1. If you make sweet tea, or your favorite style, do you use Luzianne, Lipton or something else?
umm... any iced tea is ok... I am not really much of a tea connosseur
2. What brand of toilet paper do you buy and is it the larger rolls or regular? Jillybean buys the toilet paper cuz she has this wierd phobia of running out of TP... so we always have at least more than 8 of some brand!
3. Which brand of bath soap do you use? Body wash or bar? I like body wash... and really I am not picky about what brand... I think we have dove in our shower...
4. What cereal do you buy for yourself? ooohh I love cereal! My favourite is Special K Soy but it is hard to find... grew up loving Honey Nut Cheerios - still do! Also really like Sugar Crisp (which is actually low in cals)
5. What brand of dishwasher detergent do you use? Liquid or tablets? We don't have a dishwasher... so no detergent... but in my dreamworld if I did... I would use liquid cuz leaves less residue.
6. What's your favorite fruit? pineapple, strawberries, blackberries, kiwi, bananas... really, I like most fruits!
7. Which brand of laundry detergent do you use? Whatever is on sale...
8. Do you like chocolate? absotively!
9. Are you right or left-handed? I write with my right hand...
10. Do you still write checks or use a debit card? I write cheques for some things... but more often than not... online banking... and credit card...

Day one back on campus... AJ picked me up this morning right on time... we made it and sure enough... in our fourth year... could not find K14 in the Simcoe Building... as if!!!! We made it just in time for the beginning or orientation, which by the way was actually a decent orientation... June Macdonald-Jenkins is wonderful and I am looking forward to having her as the fourth year co-ordinator.
During lunch break I worked at getting everything organized... I went to the computer commons and printed of my OSAP estimate so that I can get my fee deferral so that I can pick up my laptop... next, went to get my student card, BUT it would be a 2hr wait... so I said I would pick it up on monday... then took a few mins to grab a coffee before heading back into the orientation...
Ending the orientation with a meeting with my faculty advisor, I headed over to the student centre to make an appointment to sign my OSAP documents for next week.. as all the ones for this week were already taken!!! The soonest I can get in is next Thurs... which is good! crazy!
At home, I sat outside for a bit enjoying the beautiful sunshine... ahh I am so glad to be getting some of this ON heat... then headed over to my darling pissy's house... her baby girl is getting sooo big... and beautiful! and... she's prego again!
Now, here I sit.. talking to Justin and writing about my day... being accused of talking to other pple while trying to fill all my darling Terracites in on my day... terrible... anyhoo... said bye to him... and now going to surf for a job... I think that I want to work at the university in the nursing lab... I can be a peer tutor... crappy money but good experience... and not too many hours... as this year is going to be pretty crazy as far as the learning requirements and expectations...
So... goodnight all... off to finish up... tomorrow is another day of orientation - more simulations and stuff... then gym... then movie night...I skipped out on the Tartan much to Kristal's heartache... lol...

Oh... Campus Fest 06... something to check out for sure!
http://www.campusfest06.ca/
I think I just might go!! Anyone wanna come?!

I have arrived!

What a crazy episode in my life story...

So I was at the airport on time - even a little early! 8:50... flight was at 9:55... or so I thought!!! I didn't leave Terrace until about 3:30 that afternoon... after boarding the plane about 1:30 and deboarding again 10 minutes after that... brutal!!! There was some sort of computer malfunction in Halifax which made it so that the pilots couldn't print of their flight plans... so we were stuck there until the problem was fixed...

Needless to say, I missed my connecting flight to Toronto that left Vancouver at 12:25... I arrived in Vancouver about 5:30 and by the time I finally has some sort of game plan it was about 7:30... and the best they could do was put me on standby for the 10:15 flight (which was full)...

For once things were starting to go my way when I heard my name paged to board the flight! There was a spot for me! YAY! With a quick call to my sweet love... I was on the plane!

The plane landed at 6:04am (ON time)... and I was home by 7:40 - greeted by beautiful 'welcome home' balloons, Koda, and my Jillybean! Ahhh so good to have landed....

Now... trying to get myself a little organized for tomorrow - school - yikes... AJ is picking me up at 8:30.. such a darling!

I am God's Plan A...

...there is no Plan B

here's a few notes from church today... some tidbits that popped out at me!

- The unseen reality - what is unseen is eternal
- Our culture conditions us to live for the moment... with no regard to eternity...
- Its a deeper calling... from the surface to the depths of intimacy with the creator of life
- Need to allow God to grip my heart with vision for eternity, not just for the moment..
- Need to store treasures in heaven - my heart will be where my treasure is
- What am I giving my life to that is sacrificing God's call on my life?
- The enemy cringes when I wake up each day - it is the call of God on my life... it is God in me...
- Words of my mouth and conviction of my heart will transform this broken world...
- The truths of his love letter must be a part of my life...
- If our vision is not for the purpose of God then our vision is only worth peanuts...
- choices we make now, set precedence for future generations
- we are responsible to live for future generations...

it was called Friday...

Road trip to Prince Rupert.... I'd wanted to go all summer so finally we just said... let's go! So we gassed up... I CHANGED THE HEADLIGHT (yes I am proud of myself!)... grabbed some Timmy's and were off... took lots of pics through a dirty windshield, I am really gonna miss the mountains!

Once we got to Prince Rupert we headed for Smiles... the place with the famous Halibut - afterall, the main purpose of going to PR was the halibut... I had never tasted halibut until yesterday, Friday September 1, 2006! Crazy I know! Needless to say, I loved the halibut... and was ready to explore everything else that Rupert has to offer... on a sad note... my camera died we got about two pictures... and just after I bought new batteries... dead... won't work... tears...
Either way... a beautiful drive... one of the most incredible in the world... to think that I know the big guy who created such masterpieces...wow!

We were home by about 7:30 maybe... so had to find something to do still! I called Christina... she was in Kitimat... so I ended up going for dinner with Adam (her friend) to Back Eddy and then we played a game of cards which I so should have won, but didn't... and then watched The Longest Yard... it was a really good movie... funny where some people find their family... guess we should keep our eyes open!

oh... and as a side note... still covered in hives!! ugh... (since Tuesday!!!!)